oh god, finally...i was thinking something wrong with blogger, but apparently it's something to do with my firefox browser which doesn't support certain features of blogger site....i had been trying to upload photos, and dying to blog over the past few days, but now all the inspirations and ideas gone.....not a single thought came to me right now, and what i supposed to type on the keyboard.

I have been receiving numerous impacts in my life recently, devastating news and could be a turning point for myself........Firstly, it's about the grouping matter that usually happened to my group....according to the international medical school standard, they only allow 6 people in a group for a class so that the teacher would be easy to conduct throughout the class and the students are able to pay attentions to the studies, but it's ironic for my group, because every year, we requested the dean office to give us a special treat offer to my group to stay 9 people...and situation seems difficult for us to request to stay on like what we used to be for next year, which is our final year over here.....every last exams of the medical school have to go on a strictly condition which i will not elaborated much over here, because it's gonna be a thousand words at least......so, we gonna split into two different separate groups......5 boys and 2 boys plus 3 girls........and everyone was given a life time chance to choose who they want to be in the same group....... i was totally in dilemma........ i didn't know what to do, who to go with.....i was told that i should go for what i am comfortable with.........and.....yeah, at first, they included me to the boys group....but seriously, if i had to choose the best among the best, i'll have to exclude one or two from these boys which i do not really have expectations for them to give me a call after we have graduated from university, and i felt totally a loser, while i know some of them wanted me to stay, but i insisted to leave, and that makes me a totally loser, and a very very bad person.......this kind of situation seems to be repeated in my life over and over again, i am tired of going out to meet new people, make friends, and go on a relationship and then till in the end i am always the one that wanted to have a change...... i cannot bear the feelings when the time comes and before knowing that i will be hurt, i often make the decision to back off in order to make myself prettier and happier..... i know it sounds self fish that i often neglected how others feeling towards me, but i really do not know how to please everyone, yeah, asshole...... 9 people.....5 years of classmates, i really do not want that separation, but rules are rules, rules from the superior, we have to obey, and i cannot please everyone, and i have to choose what is the best for myself although i am not sure if i will get better along with these people, but there is always a last chapter in our lives, we have to accept it although it is hard to bear and difficult to swallow........